This is one of the most frequent and most frustrating things we hear. If you stop and think about it, you’re implying that we as foster parents must be heartless because we don’t get attached or it won’t hurt us when they leave.
That’s far from the truth.
As foster parents, we’ve just weighed the pros and cons and calculated the risks. We see that these children desperately need love and attachment, and their need for this kind of stability and security far outweighs our need to be protected from tough emotions. We’ve decided that, as the adults in the situation, we will bear the load of that burden rather than ask the children to. We’ve learned that if you foster long enough, you will inevitably limp through the rest of your life, carrying the scars of the children who have crossed your path.